Benji

The last time I remember seeing Benji, we were on set. He had just bought a brand new Mercedes and this car was *flawless*. Beyoncé flawless. I think it was when the CLS was first made into that really swoopy model. As most Production Designers do, he parked as close as he could to the action, but agreed to give me his keys to move that beautiful machine if needed. By the end of the day, I had lost his keys. I swore I gave them back to him though, so he took on the responsibility. I remember him saying "you know, I actually did take them from you, this is my fault". I couldn't remember if he had or not, truly.

Either way, I started to get absolutely nuts and anxious and teary-eyed and I can remember him putting his hands on my shoulders and saying "It's just a car. They'll make more keys for it. Not worth flipping about". That was so Benji. I was always SO excited when directed to put his name on a call sheet. I knew fun was ahead.

I know there are those people that make us all think "oh, he was so full of life" or "man, he was talented", but Benji was both of those things in a way the rest of us could only dream of. He was bursting with life, but in that subtle way that doesn't make him a total clown. And he was creative in that manner that makes the rest of us who like to think we're creative seethe with jealously at how effortlessly good ideas came to him.

Benji was the kind of guy you wanted to hang out with so badly. He was bright and fun and coolly calm all the time. And when he did slightly lose his temper, he was so handsome doing it you didn't even care. He was the sort of man that could pull of sleeves of tattoos and a suit with simultaneous relevance and timeless class. He was impossibly hip. He looked like a banker, art gallery owner, box office lead, old-timey gangster, and NYC club promoter all at once. The man was beautiful.

When I left production, he's not a person I really kept in touch with until Instagram. I don't remember if he followed me or I followed him first, but his account was such a delight. It was a perfect mix of production and partying and daily normal life, but it was very clear his favorite subjects of art were his children. So many incredible photos and videos of his beloved babies who all seem to be little sparks that flew off the flame that was their father. My heart absolutely breaks for those kids. And his new fiancé. Benji just seemed SO happy. That's really the only consolation I can take in a time like this. That Benji passed away in what appeared to be a very high peak in his life, surrounded by love and beauty.