Night before last, some sort of pushy mafia STEPS TO THIS and tries to force me to to give them things I don't owe them. Then they take it to the next level, and I have to run out of a house in semi-formal wear, dragging a little girl that belongs to that family with me to save her from them. Just as I start to get her to safety, I turn to see them REALLY ratchet up the crazy and kill a pregnant lady with a machine gun. I basically turned on the wheels at that point and damn near pulled the little girl's arm out of the socket running away with her. When I realize there's not enough places for us to hide, I skid out around the corner of a house, drop down and pull up a few pieces of lattice that close in the underside of a deck, shove her through the hole and crawl in after her hoping nobody saw us. I tell her she has to be as quiet as possible and we're not moving until they're all gone. Then I wake up. WTF.
There are several different ways to break this monstrosity down right now, but I'm not going to into them. I was just pumped as fuck at how well I could run in heels, how heroic I was to actually save someone else besides myself, and how smart was to think to hide where city woodchucks do.
Last night. The dream actually starts out hilariously. Somehow, I'm extremely good friends with the Kardashian sisters. (Khloe obvs being my fave) I have to go to some sort of family picnic with them. On the way to said picnic, they explain to me I have to meet and make friends with their surrogate father (besides Bruce?) who happens to be Larry David. Oh, and they call him Lawrence. Upon arrival at the party, they have made their hellos and I spot Larry. I introduce myself while calling him Larry, and after he compliments my outfit and actually say "you're killing it", he has the nuts to correct me and say "No, it's Lawrence for these girls". Then I turn around and I somehow have the bigger nuts to say "I'm not one of these girls." Then I smile my best "sorry I'm not sorry, motherfucker" smile and stride out of there. For no reason at all. The poor guy just wanted to be called Lawrence. What is my problem?
Khloe wasn't even mad though. (duh) She and I end up back at some apartment, and we're having a grand old time. A guy I may or may not be sweet on shows up. For some odd reason, we start to have these extremely physical competitions involving very elaborate obstacle courses. Feats of strength! It's all too complicated to try to describe, but it ends with us sprinting out toward this cliff that you can't actually tell is a cliff. Before I know it, he's leapt off and I'm right behind him. And I don't just jump, I jump off that mofo like I'm about to take flight. Then... I look down. And it flashes through my brain that I'm far too high to survive the impact to the water. But I pedal my legs and wave my arms to give me optimal chance for landing without shattering my life and at the last second, I flex my legs straight down and grasp my nose as hard as I can like I'm a veteran member of the Coast Guard. I plunge into the water... and smile. A big huge smile that I was probably embarrassingly doing in my sleep. I unfurl and kick my way back up to the surface. When I arrive, the intro to Every Teardrop Is A Waterfall by Coldplay starts blasting, (yes, I'm so weird, my brain scored and soundtracked my own dream) my face is no longer one of shock, it has morphed into a sly grin of "yeah, meh, I jump off shit like that all the time." and he doesn't seem surprised at all. He's pleasantly looking at me as if he had no doubt I would make that jump flawlessly. The music quiets a little, then he suggests we swim across the cold, choppy, grey channel we're currently treading water in because "I'm hungry, do you want to get lunch or something?". Of course I want lunch. Thanks for asking. Paddle paddle kick kick.
I have no idea what any of that means.... but
Maybe I'm in the black, maybe I'm on my knees
Maybe I'm in the gap between the two trapezes
But my heart is beating and my pulses start
Cathedrals in my heart
Maybe I'm in the gap between the two trapezes
But my heart is beating and my pulses start
Cathedrals in my heart
Now that song will be in my head all day.
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